Feedback follows us wherever we go. But is feedback always worth following?
Good feedback makes us better. Bad feedback makes us bitter. When feedback is delivered with candor, caring and a deep sense of connection, it feels empowering. We take steps to improve, often in partnership with the person who gave it. When feedback is poorly timed, poorly sized, and poorly shared, it feels draining. We're too depleted and defeated to actually move forward.
To decide whether feedback will end up causing you more joy or fear, put it to the test: Context, Recognition and Action. If it passes all three, it's probably worth following. If not, you may want to pass.
The context test
First, evaluate the context. Did you ask for or invite this feedback? Who gave it, and what is their relationship to your work? How did they provide the feedback -did you get a sense that it was thoughtful, genuine and well-meaning? Does the feedback relate to a single moment in time or is it something that's ongoing? And, perhaps most important: Does it describe what you've done or who you are? We can change our behaviors much more easily than we can change our being.
The recognition test
Even if feedback may be potentially useful, it still needs to be valid. Next, try to get a strong read on the feedback you received by gathering insights from others. Your best bet is to approach others who know you well to determine whether they see similar pictures or patterns. Do they recognize this feedback, or does it seem like a strange signal? If enough people see it, you probably should, too.
The action test
Finally, you should decide whether this feedback can point you towards a concrete next step. Can you turn feedback into an action? For example, if you're told that you talk too quickly during presentations, that's something you can improve with effort and intent. But if the message is too vague and broad, then the feedback isn't likely to lead to change or improvement.
Feedback comes in lots of forms, and it's up to us to decide how to use it. So put feedback to the test - if it measures up, you'll get the results you need to succeed.